THE GRIP By Barbara

The Grip

Back in 2000 I met someone who was on heroin and crack cocaine and because I was a curious young lady I became intrigued with what the buzz was about. He knew this. He used this an excuse to get me to take cocaine. It was useful for him that I got into crack, he needed me to get into it so I would then help him get money to fund it.

He needed me and I needed him and we both needed crack.

I took it not knowing I would enjoy it or even like the buzz, it was a powerful buzz. Within a couple of weeks I became addicted. I was smoking anything from £200- £1000 a day. I would street work to fund this along with other stuff I can’t mention here. I put myself in very risky situations.

In 2003 I decided enough was enough.

I was having to face a prison sentence and I didn’t fancy going in having to do cold turkey inside. I went to my mums to do a home detox.

I pushed through it. Hot and cold sweats, hallucinations, psychosis, crack gets a grip on your brain, you have to get a grip on its grip, at times it was like torture . I managed to find a small part of me that kept strong, that strength grew. It was scary times, I took every day as it came. After 2 and a half months I was free from the grip. Proof you can do anything with the right mind.

I`m now 15 years clean and I am doing voluntary work as a peer mentor. I helping others turn things around.

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